Monday, October 22, 2012

Article of the week 10/22

1. Compose a brief reaction to this essay. 2. Critique the structure & it's effectiveness. 3. If you were to model an essay after this example, what would your subject be? "How to... 10 Essentials to Get You Started." (We will write this essay next marking period) http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/print?id=3469271&type=story

42 comments:

  1. Before i even read this essay, the layout to me was just odd. When i started reading it though, there were some phrases i wasn't quite sure about like "Taco Bell Chihuahua" and "a Tuesday for John Daly". I also thought i saw some grammatical errors within the first few lines, but that could've just been my mistaking. After reading this two times through, i'm still having a hard time figuring out the point of why this was written in the first place. It might be talking about how easily NBA stars go bankrupt, but i'm still not 100% sure. If i had to model an essay after this example, it would be on how easily people can loose money and why i guess, although i just wouldn't model an essay after this one in the first place because it's just odd to me.

    Maxine H, P2

    ReplyDelete
  2. The author who wrote this must have no life. I learned nothing, but how much it costs to fix a planes windsheild. The author uses sarcasim throughout the whole article and maybe because im young i do not understand all the references he uses. "Taco Bell Chihuahua" means absolutley nothing to me. I dont even know half the people he talked about in the article. I think if the author used more well-known people i could understand it a little more, but all in all i understood the main concept. I liked how the article was set up, espesically the bulleted format. If i had to make a model after this article i would make my subject: how easy stars blow their money. i would also use more well-known people in my references.



    Conor Smith
    Period 2


    ReplyDelete
  3. This article was somewhat informative and mildly entertaining. It outlined several of the ways in which pro athletes manage to go broke after making hundreds of millions of dollars, and commented that it was a common occurrence. The satirical matter in which it was written brought humor to the piece. By writing this as a guide the author was able to highlight his sarcastic remarks and easily put in historical examples of the imprudent behavior that leads to the bankruptcy of multimillionaires. If were to write an essay with similar structure I would write "A black man's guide to the US judicial system."

    Evan B period 5

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  4. While I was reading this article, I noticed a bunch of words that didn’t seem like they quite fit in the article. Agreeing with Maxine, I believe that "Taco Bell Chihuahua" and "a Tuesday for John Daly" are very odd topics to bring up in this type of article. To me, this article wasn’t very effective in drawing my attention because the author was overly opinionated. Also, I think that the way the author structured his article was very poor and he obviously didn’t get his point across. In the end, I think the author was trying to be humorous by saying things like “Hire an agent who sniffs a lot and/or is constantly checking the scores on his BlackBerry”. To me,this wasn’t comical at all and this author comes off as very naïve and ignorant. If I were to write this article over, it's title would definitely be more relevant to the topic. Also, I’d refrain from making smart comments and focus more on the facts about the retirement of NBA players.

    Cassidy M p2

    ReplyDelete
  5. I thought that this essay was written and laid out interestingly. I think the author's tone was sarcasm. He was describing the ways to become bankrupt, and all of the things football players do that make them go broke. The author was using humor in his essay as well by saying, "So order my How to Go Bankrupt series now, and get this empty refrigerator box to sleep in, absolutely free!" I liked the way the essay was written. He counted down all the stupid things that football players do to waste their money and go bankrupt. This layout was more interesting to me. I think this essay was not meant to be extremely effective, because it is very sarcastic and makes fun of a lot of players. However, it does have some effect, because it shows that bankruptcy will happen to people if they are unwise with their money. I thought the article was kind of entertaining. If I were to model an essay after this example, my subject would probably be "how to lose all your money in a week.”

    Haley K. Period 5

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  6. My first reaction to this essay is confusion. It wasn’t very clear what he was talking about, and it wasn’t written very well. The author used way too many phrases that I didn’t understand, which leads me to believe it was written for a very specific audience. However, the people who would know what the terms meant would probably be offended by the article, as it was written in a very scathing tone. He seemed to be trying to make light of a situation, but did it very badly and came off as a jerk. It was very irritating not understanding the terminology and not caring about the subject. The structure of the essay was interesting though. I like the numbered list and how each one relates back to the main topic. If I were to write an essay modeled after this one, my subject would probably be “How to Design like a Child…10 Essentials to Get You Started.”
    -Amy B Period 1

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  7. This article represents the problems with contemporary journalism. First among these is the tendency to sensationalism. This article concerns a topic which has no value to the vast majority of the population. Sports 'Journalism' is useless at its best, but this is simply absurd. If these actors want to waste their unearned fortunes on luxurious living, why stop them? As long as they are taxed at an appropriate rate (90% on several million dollars is in no way too high) they should be allowed to waste their unnecessary money on whatever they want.
    The article may have had an interesting format, which could be used successively in the pursuit of reputable news, opinion, or op-ed, but its content is of no use to anyone but the morons who waste this money, and I would be surprised if any of them could read at this level.
    If I were to write in a similar format I would probably reserve such sarcastic attacks for political gaffs on the level of absurdity as the recently revealed Republican attitude towards rape. (http://www.theonion.com/articles/mother-mary-was-essentially-raped-mourdock-says-wh,30083/)

    ReplyDelete
  8. I thought that this essay was written very oddly. The author’s tone was very sarcastic and some things didn’t seem to fit. It was talking about all the mistakes the athletes make to make them go bankrupt. The author tried using humor in his essay maybe to draw in the reader. Saying something like, “With my How to Go Bankrupt DVD series, it’s a layup to get belly-up!” I don’t really think that this essay was meant to be effective because he was being sarcastic and making fun of athletes. I think he more was trying to interest the reader and make it humorous. If I were to write model and essay after this one I would make one about how easily it can be too loose money or something like that. Overall I could tell that the author was being sarcastic and I found it a little entertaining to read.

    Jessica B. Period 1

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  9. The way this article was written was very contemptuous and arrogant, however, i liked how it caught my attention. Rick Reilly started with, "Congrats, newly minted NBA rookie!
    Now you've been drafted. Next comes the delicious multimillion-dollar contract. And that's when you must do what most NBA players do: start going through cash like Jack Black through the Keebler factory." After reading this i was hooked, and wanted to continue to see what he meant by that. As i continued reading i got the impression that he was mimicking athletes. If i were to write the article in another format i would not use as much sarcasm, but still use it because it gets his point across. If your not looking for his point of view, you can find a completely new article to read. I liked how his sarcasm displayed his thoughts in a humerus way. To change the subject, i would make it, "how to lose your money fast", and not use the term bankrupt.
    Julia Watsky p.2

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  10. This article was so funny. The author clearly meant it as a joke. He completely slammed all the once multi-million airs for their stupidity. Even though I was laughing through the whole article, I didn't like the set up. It didn't really seem like an essay. Instead of doing number points, I wish the author would have let it fluently go from point to point in paragraph form. It would have been even more funny if it wasn't so choppy. If i were to model this essay, my subject would have been "loose your millions fast". I really like the humor in this article and I would have tried to keep it.

    Eden W.
    p.5

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  11. The tone of the article is what made it readable. If it didn't have that upbeat, commercial advertising, witty attitude, the author, Rick Reilly, would look like a complete jerk. However, because Reilly did set the right tone, the article was compelling and attention grabbing and simply enjoyable to read. While many disagree with the way the article was set up, I believe that Reilly was effective when getting his point across; pro-athletes spend money as if they have an infinite resource of it when, in fact, "60% are broke after five years of retirement." If I were to model this essay, I would change the subject to "loose your millions fast." I agree with Eden when she said the humor in this article was a good hook.

    Aaryne A
    Period 5

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  12. I found this article hilarious and interesting because I am a fan of sports and I agree that basketball players do spend their money frivolously. This type of structure is very effective in my eyes because it is enjoyable to read (unless you are the NBA player being critiqued) and holds the reader's attention. If I were to model an essay after this structure I would be using disagreeing with something but using sarcasm to get my point across. "With my How to Go Bankrupt* DVD series, it's a layup to go belly-up!" In this quote from the article it shows how he clearly doesn't actually want them to go bankrupt but mocks the NBA players who do.
    Brittany Sullivan Period 5

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  13. This was an article that I really did enjoy reading. I thought it was creative and hilarious. It really captivated me and made me want to continue reading just to see what funny, sarcastic thing the author would write next. The structure was not really an essay-like structure though. The structure was a topic with many descriptions of subtopics. I thought that it was a very effect way of getting the author's point across because it allowed him to back up his argument with many different facts and opinions. If I were to write an essay modeled after this one my title would be, "How to lose you money... and fast!! 10 Essentials to Get You Started."

    Morgan R.
    p-1

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  14. This article was very interesting to me. It was so shocking to me to see this pro athletes making millions of dollars annually and going broke. Some of us barely have any money to spend on essential things that we need, but these players go out and spend millions of dollars on things that they don't need. The structure was somewhat not effective I believe because the author should wrote the whole thing in a regular essay format, not numbering examples. If I had to model this essay after something, it would be on how many people spend money carelessly.

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  15. This article ,in my opinion, was pointless, useless, and written in a style that reflects the writers arrogance. Though I do agree that the article was so sarcastic in a way that made me laugh, I think the writer of this article could have made it a bit more serious.Like Maxine and Cassidy said, the wording of the article was a bit hard to understand when the write wrote phrases such as "start going through cash like Jack Black through the Keebler factory." This type of word choice may confused me and personally, I didn't find the article to be very amusing. If I were to write an essay modeling this format, I think a more appropriate subject would have been the failure of a movie or restaurant, or even like Nate said, political gaffs. I feel like this type of sarcasm works well when you are a critique or analyzing something, and not an article such as this.
    Fatoumata S. Period 2

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  16. This article is quite bad, well terrible. It starts off topics without a proper introduction then goes onto another topic. The article also sounds like it's making fun of those who play professional NBA, even if it's trying to be kind of helpful to those who play Baseball and are new. I also feel like it shouldn't be an essay, but more like a commercial on a show like saturday night live. The layout's terrible along with the fact that it has barely any paragraphs that are actual paragraphs with a topic sentence and statements backing up that topic sentence. If I was to model an essay after this style I'd probably do something less sarcastic, like How to Swim 10 Essentials to Get you Started as you could provide more logical information in this format along with not being sarcastic like the author of this article was.

    Quinn B. Period 2

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  17. I think there are certain aspects of this article that work very well and others that do not. However, as a fan of journalism and someone who has a little bit of experience with it, I actually think the overall tone of the writing is very effective at what it's meant to do. Though some people read it and think the author as arrogant, that just proves that he was able to right an effective editorial. The article was obviously written to get a reaction out of whoever it is that is reading it and clearly, that was achieved. The author was successful at writing a piece that catches people's attention, whether it be in a negative or positive manner. However, the actual layout of the article is a little confusing and messy. If written in a more "standard" form with paragraphs and such, I think it could've had a stronger effect than what it had in terms of getting the message across in a more organized way that appeals to a larger range of readers.

    - Sarah C. Period 5

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  18. I thought the author did a good job in getting his point across in an amusing way. I understood that he was trying to say how most athletes are careless with their money and that most of them waste their money on foolish things. I think the structure for his article was successful in getting his point across in a short and precise way, but I don't think I would consider it a well-structured essay. If he had written it in paragraphs and explained his 10 points in a more elaborate way, then I would consider it an essay. However, for the point the author was trying to make, I believe it was more successful in the way he wrote it. The object of this article was to sarcastically inform the reader of the 10 main reasons athletes go bankrupt, and the most successful way was how he did it: short, sweet and to the point with examples.
    Carlye M. Period 5

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  19. This essay wasn't really effective to me. I think this is mainly because of the structure. I couldn't really take it seriously because it seemed so unofficial, due to the numbering. However, it was very interesting because of the author's tone and unique way of presenting his ideas. Like Sarah said, he was effective and got his point across. It wasn't too wordy nor did it drag on. If I understood all the innuendos he made, then this essay definitely would be more humorous and I'd appreciate it more. If I were to write an essay in this format, I'd write about something that appeals to everyone, like 'How to Save Money in 10 Days'.
    -Ayeshra A. Period 1

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  20. While I did find this article entertaining, I really didn't like the set up of it. Just as Ayeshra said, it was very unofficial. I couldn't take the author seriously and honestly with all the references he was making... I had no idea WHO or WHAT he was talking about, so I was quiet lost. So with that said it wasn't effective for me.
    Rachel I.
    Period 1

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    Replies
    1. I don't really understand what you mean by, "If you were to model an essay after this example, what would your subject be? "How to... 10 Essentials to Get You Started."
      Rachel I. Per 1

      Delete
  21. I feel this article truly gets it's point across if you stay open minded while reading and remember exactly what they are trying to say. This essay to me seems to be really effective. In the first few sentences it tells you exactly what it will be about, for example when it says," Filing for bankruptcy is a long-standing tradition for NBA players, 60% of whom, according to the Toronto Star, are broke five years after they retire. The other 40% deliver the Toronto Star." and to me that is what's so important. This paper gets this article across in a very useful and simple way. It bullets its exact thoughts and provides specific examples. I also think the only reason why people might think this essay is not affective or is confusing is because it is not set up in the standard five paragraphs like most students are used to. In my opinion I really appreciated the different formation of this essay, and it made it very entertaining to read.

    Isabella S. Per 2

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  22. I found this article really funny and entertaining. Many people have said earlier that they do not like the set up of this article but I liked it. I think the format made it easy to differentiate between the points that the author was trying to make. If I were to make an essay out of this my title would be "From High Life to Low Life." In the essay I would talk about how these players get so attached to living like Kings but once its taken away they can't make the jump back down to normal spending.
    Christina Smith
    Period 2

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  23. I didn't really like the authors tone in this article or the format. I think the author was rude and ignorant, but did a good job at getting their point across. The author seemed more interested in entertaining the reader instead of being realistic. When the author said "Buy a jet. They burn money like the Pentagon." I thought it was very rude and if I were a famous athlete I would be offended by it.

    Morgan Lazowy. p.2

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  24. I thought that this article did a pretty good job at showing how greed gets the better of everyone. But more importantly it also shows how the system we all live under is one were it is very easy to overindulge oneself.Also it tells me that those who make these mega bucks really don't deserve the money that they earn and maybe these professional leagues should have salary caps to make sure pro athletes do not fall prey to their own greed. As for the structure, it was terrible, he didn't even write it as a whole, continuous paper, but rather a sheet of fun facts meant to make us laugh( admittedly these stories were pretty funny). To be blunt, I have no idea how to answer the third part.

    Steve Z.
    period 5

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  25. I was appalled to find out that most athletes go through cash so quickly and “end up with nothing but lint in their pockets.” The money is being used for unneeded items such as planes, yachts, multiple overpriced cars, and other “really stupid stuff.” Perhaps these athletes should think about using their money to help those who are struggling to just put food on the table. They need to learn how to save money. Furthermore, the structure was somewhat effective. The author’s goal was to inform the reader of these athletes’ spending problem. He conveyed his message in a way that was easy to understand; he stated his point and gave examples. I thought the author’s sarcasm made the article entertaining. Moreover, if I were to model an essay after this article, I would write about the uneven distribution of wealth in our society. It seems like athletes have so much while others have so little.
    David Eaton

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  26. I didn't think this article was funny. I think it just made fun of professional NBA players. The author just makes himself sound rude and kind of annoying. It seemed like he was trying too hard to make the reader laugh. Although, I did like the structure of the article because it was organized in the way of the "10 essentials" it listed. I do think the author was successful in getting his point across. The 10 bullet points made it clearer and easier for the reader. If I were to model an essay after this article I would write it about how to go bankrupt when you become famous.

    Miriah Ventre
    period 5

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  27. Although this article was very humorous, it was not very intriguing. The author's tone came off as arrogant, rather than comical. I understand that this article is a type of editorial, but it still lacks in depth. On the other hand, the hook of the essay was very effective. By starting the essay with "Congrats, newly minted NBA rookie!...Next comes the delicious multimillion-dollar contract. And that's when you...start going through cash like Jack Black through the Keebler factory." That grabbed my attention and made me want to read more. However, as I read through the "ten essentials," I started to get bored and annoyed of the author's levity. The list was very repetitive and offensive. I think this type of list would have been better if the article was about a more serious issue, and not one of frivolity.

    Lianne Y, Per. 5

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  28. This article did a nice job of showing how materialistic our society is. People think the definition of being "famous" is to have an over-sized house and multiple cars. They always sport the new trends so they are "with the times". These athletes get so caught up in fame that they go crazy with their spending. I also feel that this relates to all Americans in general. Most of us feel like we have to have the latest devices, and everything else thats new. It goes to show you that not only athletes and celebrities, but normal people can get caught up in progress, and end up losing money as well. Even though the point that was trying to be made was made, there was no persuasion or setup in the responses of this other, and if comments and explanations were made about how this affluenza is taking over, then the writing portion would give readers a more clear view of what to think about.

    Cassie F-C, Period 5.

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  29. After reading this article, I was sad that athletes end up poor so soon after their careers end, but I felt that it was their own fault because they could have easily avoided this issue. The article states that, "Baseball slugger Jack Clark had 18 cars and owed money on 17 when he went broke." This just shows the greed that people possess when they are rich. I believe this article was effective in showing people that anyone can become poor, even athletes making millions of dollars. Honestly, these people who make millions and spend it all away are idiots. All they need to do is conserve some of it and they are set for life. If I were to model an essay after this example, it would have to be something about ways on how to throw your life away.

    Justin W. Period 5

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  30. I personally did not find this article interesting or entertaining which is what I expect was the author’s goals were when writing the piece. In fact, even after reading the article, I can see no reason why the author thought it was an acceptable piece. The format was odd, there was too much humor, and most of that humor just went over my head anyway. I think the reason the article was written was to illustrate how easily MBA players can spend all their money. However, this was not completely clear to me even after reading the article so it is not effective in conveying it’s message. Although I do not like this type of writing, my topic modeled after this article would be “How to Succeed. Ten Steps to Get You Started.”

    Griffin S.
    Period 5

    ReplyDelete
  31. At first glance, I was confused by the format of this essay. But as I began reading it started to make a little more sense. I liked how author used sarcasm to make his points humorous. Instead of writing a standard essay he took a more creative approach and changed up the format, making it even more entertaining to read. Although, I feel it would have been more amusing if I knew what and who he was referencing to. There were many references to sports stars who I have no idea even existed. He was most likely writing for a specific type of audience, probably one that it more educated in sports. I don't think that this essay was in any way effective, however I don't think that effectiveness is what the author was shooting for. If I were to model an essay after this my subject would probably be about something more relevant and something that could be read and understood by more audiences.

    Jackie W
    Per.2

    ReplyDelete
  32. The author of this unusual article, if one would call it that had a very angry tone. The information stated in the article seemed to be worded very angrily and sort of in a jealous tone as well. Although I usually enjoy sarcasm in articles because of the entertainment purposes, but the amount of sarcasm is kind of sickening and just makes the author sound like he is a very jealous man. The main thing that gets me is that this author is worrying way too much on other people's lives and doesn't just mind his own business. For example when he says "Baseball slugger Jack Clark had 18 cars and owed money on 17 before when we went broke" I immediately think, "why do you care what this person does". Overall the format of this article is very childish and reminds me of something a younger child would format a piece. If the authors purpose was to sound intelligent it didn't work out so well, to me it just made me thin that this person is a little bit jealous. If I were to model an essay about this subject I would probably focus specifically on a certain sport instead of jumping around to different professional athletes.

    Cory W. Period 1

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  33. I thought that this article was very odd, but it was also entertaining. The author of it was obviously not a fan of all the athletes that, at one point are filthy rich, and the next thing they know they've got nothing left. At the same time though, as Maxine said, I found this a very confusing article to read. The author jumps around a lot and the writing just seems very unorganized and thrown together oddly. If I were to write an article structured like this I would probably choose a more specific topic that has more of a main focus and is easy for the majority of people to understand. This article is hard to understand unless the reader is a big fan of sports; many of the names were unfamiliar to me and the writer didn't take any time to go into further, more specific details. I might've chosen to write an article like this on 10 essentials one should know about conserving money or something along those lines.

    Katlyn G. Period 2

    ReplyDelete
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